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if you want to insult me, dare to in my face*

Friday, October 20, 2006
8:53 PM



YES THAT IS THE MOST WONDERFUL GUY SINGER IN MY CHARTS!!! GIVE IT UP FOR JESSE MCCARTNEY!!! YEA!! he rocks. nothing is going to stop me from buying he and jojo's newest album. hilary duff's comes out next year in feb i think... it was supposed to come out in november this year but...

today was that damned EL performance. the audience were good even though they laughed excessively. wait. some music is causing some distruption my ears. WHO THE HELL SANG CHASING CARS???!!! OWN UP NOW!!! oh yeah, i forgot, whoever he is, he didn't tell me to prepare for this totally sad, sad, slow stupid long song. oh, yes. its SNOW PATROL. the guy on the radio just reminded me. Thank you.

let me continue. so we had a run and after break, make- up. YEAH, SHADOWS NEED MAKE-UP. DUH. AS IF. shadows don't need make-up. but suprisingly, qiting the shadow and natalie and charlene the shadows had to wear make-up. FUNNY HUH? i seriously haven't seen MY shadow wearing make- up. then again, it was a performance. and a performance is a performance, and no matter what, we had to satisfy the audience's starvation of entertainment of the day. whatever. it was boring. i have nothing to write

dunno why i always make the same mistakes. the same ones over and over again. from primary 6 ever since that...
nevermind. its sad to bring out this sort of weird stuff. seriously, if you ask me to name my ex-classmate's full names, i won't be able to name you any. its like * SNAP> LOSE MEMORY IN A YEAR*. any TA-DAA, EVERYTHING GONE. but the genting trip that went wrong last year, it wouldn't escape my mind.
ITS ALL THAT OVER-CHARMING-TOPLESS guy's fault. HIS FAULT. WHY did he have to bring my childhood friend into his room, with 2 other half-naked guys.
NERISSA YOU BITCH. HOW DARE YOU?! HOW DARE YOU?! we tried to help you. A GIRL IN A HOTEL ROOM WITH 3 HALF-NAKED GUYS. WHAT DO YOU THINK WILL HAPPEN?

actually, nothing happened because your dear roomates rushed into the guys' room without any warning, before anything could happen, and guess what, THEY WERE FORCED TO STAY IN THE BOYs' ROOM TOGETHER WITH YOU. THOSE STUPID HALF- NAKED GUYS! AS IF THAT PLUMP ONE HAD ANY MUCH OF A FIGURE ANYWAY. nothing happened. we watched tv and didn't sleep. YOU ARE THE CULPRIT. and YOU NERISSA, became a total bitch, scolding us because we had to interfere with YOUR MOST PROBABLY-ALMOST SEX with a GUY WHO HAS A GIRLFRIEND. THE OVERLY-CHARMING GUY HAD A GIRLFRIEND AND YOU DARED TO MESS AROUND. I COULD HAVE SLAPPED YOU.

BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.
BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.
BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.
BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.
BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.
BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.
BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.
BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.
BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.
BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.
BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.
BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.
BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.
BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.
BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.
BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.
BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.
BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.
BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.
BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.
BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.
BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.
BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.
BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.
BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.
BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH. BITCH.


noted*



if you want to insult me, dare to in my face*

Wednesday, October 18, 2006
8:33 PM

MY PHONE!! HEAL YOURSELF YOU @#^%$^*$%!!!!!!!!!!!!! i don't want to use my father's phone!!! I WANT TO USE YOU!! GET ALIVE, BABY!!! QUICK. before i suffocate and die.

i do not like using my dad's handphone AT ALL. it has none of me in it, just feels like the man himself. as if i dare to ask for a new one. i totally would if i want to die now, of lectures on wastage of money and days of getting scolded, playing piano like the world's least possible next beethoven... i am currently mustering my courage now. i will ask when i eventually collect enough. courage. IMPOSSIBLE. somebody kill me. i don't dare to do it myself. :( sadly.

today was damn boring. sun1 wu2 kong1- that animated- crazy- fool of a monkey who enjoys calling himself a saviour or hero of some kind, is horrendous and @#%$&$ idiotic, providing hours of boredom, with the power to turn hundreds of happy students to sullen, sad, sad people. can't the organisers think of a topic more exciting of a story to tell rather than a story about A STUPID BONEY MONKEY WAVING A LONG STICK AROUND in attempt to kill people or creatures.

my legs were ready to collapse from that monk- praying-like seating position. it sucked. GROWING CHILDREN NEED MORE SPACE. you know, so that their legs can ACTUALLY GROW. like the old-age china ladies, who had to wrap their feet in a disgusting manner to keep their feet disgustingly small and tiny. by seating like that, we are, in a way, trying to stop ourselves from growing because of being binded by the small space of air binding us.

tomorrow is thursday, promotional day, A HOLIDAY, AND GUESS WHAT? THERE IS CCA! DAMN THE CCA. 9AM TO 4PM!!!! I WAKE UP AT 12PM ON HOLIDAYS. COUNT THE HOURS I WILL SKIP SLEEPING!! and 4pm???????????!!!!!!! what the heck do we need 7hours for. i am stage manager and will probably spend those hours sitting away in sad agony. i shall bring all my FEARLESS library books tomorrow. i don't need anyone to wake me up half way through CCA. at all.

( FEARLESS is a book series, not books which are fearless. even with an IQ of only 20, you should know that. i sympathise with you if you have lower than 20) i heard this jessica simpson song a few times just now... its repeating but not that bad. i am a fan of hers and anyway, they are below for your seeing...

Lyrics: Jessica Simpson - I Belong To Me [Artist Lyrics]Album: A Public Affair
Lyrics to Jessica Simpson I Belong To Me

Oh yeah
It's not that I dont wanna share my life with you baby
It's just that I'm the one I need to be true to baby
And I won't give up me to be part of you
It's not that I dont want to have you in my life baby
it's just you gotta know that its got to be right baby
before I open up my heart to you
I dont need somebody to complete me
I complete myslef
nobody has got to belong to somebody else
I belong to me
I don't belong to you
my heart is my posession
I'll be my own reflection
I belong to me
I'm one not half of two
and if you're gonna love me
you should know this baby
I belong to me
I gota let you know before I let you in baby
that who I am is not about who I am with baby
That don't mean I dont wanna be here with you
I do
I dont need somebody to complete me
I want you to know I give all my love but
I'm not givin' all my soul
I belong to me
I don't belong to you
my heart is my posession
I'll be my own reflection
I belong to me
I'm one not half of two
and if you're gonna love me
you should know this baby
I belong to me
Oh yeah
Love don't mean changin who you are to be
who somebody wants you to be
nobody has got to belong to nobody
I belong to me
I don't belong to you
my heart is my posession
I'll be my own reflection
I belong to me
I don't belong to you
my heart is my posession
I'll be my own reflection
I belong to me
I'm one not half of two,
and if your gonna love me
you should know this baby
I belong to me

it's just you gotta know that its got to be right baby
before I open up my heart to you
I dont need somebody to complete me
I complete myslef
nobody has got to belong to somebody else
I belong to me
I don't belong to you
my heart is my posession
I'll be my own reflection
I belong to me
I'm one not half of two
and if you're gonna love me
you should know this baby
I belong to me
I gota let you know before I let you in baby
that who I am is not about who I am with baby
That don't mean I dont wanna be here with you
I do
I dont need somebody to complete me
I want you to know I give all my love but
I'm not givin' all my soul
I belong to me
I don't belong to you
my heart is my posession
I'll be my own reflection
I belong to me
I'm one not half of two
and if you're gonna love me
you should know this baby
I belong to me
Oh yeah
Love don't mean changin who you are to be
who somebody wants you to be
nobody has got to belong to nobody
I belong to me
I don't belong to you
my heart is my posession
I'll be my own reflection
I belong to me
I don't belong to you
my heart is my posession
I'll be my own reflection
I belong to me
I'm one not half of two,
and if your gonna love me
you should know this baby
I belong to me






noted*



if you want to insult me, dare to in my face*

Monday, October 16, 2006
4:24 PM

dunno if mungyu noticed this morning when she got on the bus, that i had been crying. no, i did not have a mood swing or something. it was my mum scolding me again, early in the morning, 5 o'clock. a perfect way to start the perfect day huh? very nice. i can think of a gazillion better ways to start off a day. 3 pieces of potato chips? a brownie? a chunk of chocolate? a cup of milk? a totally absorbing book? i can name 10 in my dreams. you will just have to wake me up.

HEADLINE NEWS : A GIRL FROM A CHINESE SPEAKING FAMILY WITH A TAIWANESE MOM FAILED HER CHINESE COMPOSITIONSSS. DOCTORS CURRENTLY INVESTIGATING THE REASON.

yes. that will definitely make headline news, or maybe tianqi's news of A CHINA GUY FAILING CHINESE? either one. equally interesting, and hilarious.
THAT IS SO UNFAIR!
WHY DIDN'T YOU JUST MARK STRICTLY FOR ALL COMPOSITIONS SO THAT WE KNOW OUR STANDARDS, NOT SUDDENLY MARKING SO STRICTLY, AND NOW CAUSING CONFUSION???!!! HOW CAN YOU DO THAT? DO YOU HAVE NO CONFIDENCE IN YOUR STUDENTS AT ALL? if you had failed me during the normal practices and perhaps told me the reasons, i could have passed!

i hate failing, and i hate getting 50+. i hate admitting failures. i hate blaming people for my failures. i hate exams. and i am beginning to hate many other things. i hate being the one to have my mum's anger thrown onto. i hate losing things. i hate my brain, and my forgetful ways. i want to change. i want to remember everything, perhaps become more organised. i have gone through so many lessons, made so much mistakes. i should change, for myself. i want to venture to somewhere new, meet new people, run away from this pathetic past, present. i hate this place.

a nightmare which turned out to reality. a mistake from many other mistakes. my phone. my old phone. that spoit due to my forgetfulness. my bus card, gone for dunno what reason. my awfulness, imperfection are getting back at me, aren't they? life sucks the ways it is. i think i have done enough damage in this world. my life needs to come to an end. but i am going to change all this. i want my forgetfulness to leave me, i want to go to new place, start life all over again. then perhaps, perhaps i can live till my life goal of 40?!

got to go now. piano lesson is yelping for my attention.


noted*